the 5 Whys

Answer "why" five times to the following question: Why are you doing PN Coaching? (Remember: Each "why" builds on the previous answer.)

Why are you doing PN coaching?
A: To lose weight
Q1: why do you want to lose weight
A: I want to look better and more attractive
Q2: Why do you want to look more attractive?
A: So I will feel better about myself
Q3: Why do I want to feel better?
A: I want to feel confident that I am being the best me possible, the best role model for Bridget, the best wife to Ben... Feeling better means I have increased confidence in my abilities
Q4: Why do I want to have more confidence?
A: So I can "step it up" at work and at home and socially
Q5: Why do I want to step it up and live my fullest life?
A: So I can feel successful at work (promotion?) so I can have meaningful friendships, so I can feel like I am a good role model to Bridget

Losing weight will make me feel successful at reaching my goals.
I dont want to be a failure, I want to be successful

I want to be a success

Ready, Willing and Able

Right now, how ready are you to change your existing nutrition, health, and fitness habits?
(1 = not ready at all; 10 = completely ready)

I decided about 6 months ago that I did not want to be in the same spot a year from now... "Wishing I was lighter"...
fast forward 6 months to July 2014, and I am the same weight I was 6 months ago, heavier by 3 lbs actually !!!

I would say I am at a 9.5 in the READY to change my existing nutrition, health and fitness habits. I need to and want to lose weight, to see some success to feel like I am moving toward my goals. In six months I want to say that I have changed, that I am no longer where I was a year ago. That I started and are actually on my journey ... not stuck at the starting line.

I am ready to ACT, just tell me what to do and I will do it, to the best of my abilities.

Right now, how willing are you to change your existing nutrition, health, and fitness habits?
(1 = not willing at all; 10 = completely willing)

9.5
I am willing to trust that someone might know more than me. And I am willing to follow instructions and the guidance of the PN coaching staff, who have done this with others and it has worked, so if I follow those same actions, I too will see success.

I am willing to change, because what I am currently doing is not working for me.

I am willing to change my behaviours: nutrition, health and fitness.

Right now, how able are you to change your existing nutrition, health, and fitness habits?
(1 = not able at all; 10 = completely able)

8.5
I believe I am able... and given enough time and effort I will see success.

I am physically able to change - I have no injuries or limitations

I am financially able to change - I have the financial resources available to commit to PN coaching, to a Gym membership, to a Personal Trainer, to purchase nutritious foods, other healthy lifestyle resources such as vitamins and supplements etc...

I need help on the psychological aspect of "ability"
- I may lack some of the knowledge - but Im willing to learn
- I may need help getting out of my own way
- stumbling blocks = "I have no time"
- I dont know how to 'ACT' - I have analysis paralysis... I get caught up in researching a problem and cant seem to "DO IT"
I need help ACTING

If you're noticing any resistance to change right now, what does that resistance look like to you?

These are my go to excuses:
- I have no Time
- I'm too busy
- I have no energy
- I'm starving
- I didn't plan for this
- I 'have' to get this other thing done first
- I haven't spent enough time with my daughter to take time out for 'Me'
-

Other resistance is more subtle... I feel like I have been 'doing' or acting when I have really been researching and planning....
writing out weekly menus and going grocery shopping for healthy food is only PART of the equation... it does not stop here... the next step (which I very often miss) is
MAKING THE FOOD and eating it
I often get caught up in the fact that I feel like I did do the work, and I deserve a reward for doing it... (e.g. now I deserve to go out for dinner at a restaurant) but I only did 1/2 the work, and it wasn't the hardest part, like in the above example:
I plan the menu
I purchase the groceries
but I dont make the recipe or eat the healthy menu I planned.
I reward myself by going out to eat at a restaurant

I need help following through and DOING IT consistently all the time

My owners Manual

Help us get to know you better. Review your toolbox of existing experiences, skills, and knowledge.

What do you already have or do that will help you when starting PN Coaching?

1) I have consistently gone to the gym and worked out with a Personal Trainer (PT) for almost 10 years. Recently I have been training with my PT, Tracey, for 3 years, twice a week. I have formed this habit. AND I ROCK IT

2) I know that I love and crave exercise. I love the endorphin rush of killing it during a work out. I love the feeling of energy and bliss I get after I work out hard. I also know that this feeling lasts for about 2 days after... so getting regular work outs is essential. I know that regular exercise keeps the depression at bay, gives me energy, makes me sleep well and makes me feel FANTASTIC.

3) I know that sleep is very important to me, my cognitive functioning and my energy levels. My sweet spot tends to be 7.5 hours.

4) I am a technology junkie, I have all sorts of fitness gadgets to help make this more fun. E.g A fitbit, that I have been using everyday since November of 2013. A heart rate monitor, that I wear religiously when I work out, then upload my data to the polar website
These are the 2 pieces of equipment I use right now, there have been others in the past, but these I use regularly

5) I have mastered the drinking water habit. I love water, and consume around 2L per day. I have been doing this pretty consistently for about 10 years.

6) I really like NEW things and experiences. And PN coaching is New to me, therefore I will be interested in it, and initially be successful simply because of the newness factor

7) I enjoy making lists and 'Checking things off', I like this about PN coaching :) it satisfies the sticker reward

8) I can be persistent if I see rewards.

9) I am fairly knowledgeable about proper weight lifting form. 10 years of weight training has taught me how to feel if I am targeting the muscles correctly.

10) I LOVE LEARNING, I try and learn new things daily. I am very open to the fact that I do not know everything. In addition, I know that the knowledge that I already have might be outdated, or no longer work under my current circumstances. e.g. I am older, I have different medical conditions etc... what worked before might not work for me now in my life as I know it right now. It is essential to keep learning and adapting and adjusting

11) I have a clear goal
I want to lose weight (lose 65lbs - or I want to weigh 145lbs)

12) I am willing to TRUST PN coaching strategies because I know it works if you do the work. practice the habits

What do you need and want in order to move forward over the next year?

I believe I am missing the critical piece of the puzzle - ACTION.

I need help with learning to ACT, to move me forward toward my goals

I need encouragement, accountability and daily pushes to ACT. especially when I dont want too, when the weather is crappy, when I am tired, when I am 'starving', when I am grumpy, when I am fed up, when I am stressed out.
I need help learning how to 'get back on my horse' - making this a habit.

First day of PN coaching

My comments about today:
Today's 5 minute action = Get outside at lunch and go for a walk
Had a PT session with Tracey - 60 mins at gym - burn phase

Assignment 1:

Pick ONE change you want to make to your health, fitness, and/or nutrition.

Break it down into very, very small pieces. Choose one tiny, easy piece. Something you can do today, in about 5 minutes.

What's your "5-minute action" for today?

I will get outside at lunch today, and go for a walk

 _____________________

(writing this on July 31st 2014... a few days after I started)
So wayyyy back in February I decided to sign myself up for a wait list for Precision Nutrition coaching ... knowing it would begin in July. and then I waited, and waited and waited.
then the day came that I got the email, that if you were on the wait list you could sign up for a guaranteed spot. I hummed and hawed, it is a lot of money. what if I wasnt successful.
I decided that what did I have to lose, worst case scenario I would be in the exact same spot this time next year.
AND because this is what I wanted to avoid on my 42nd birthday (which is in 23 days btw!!!)
Last year on my birthday, aug-22-2013 I posted that I didnt want to be in the same place as I was as last year:

"This means CHANGE your behavior. I don't want to turn 42 (next year same time) and say, "I wish I had made better use of last year".

so, I guess better late than never right? on July 21st, 2014 I started Precision Nutrition's coaching program for Women. I am on Team GIFT with coach Veronica. And so far am loving it.
GIFT stands for whatever I want it to stand for, Coach Veronica suggested
Girls in Fitness Training - I kinda liked that one :)
she also told us to take this PN coaching as a gift to ourselves, I will make this my early birthday present. and give myself the ULTIMATE 43rd birthday of reaching my weight loss goals, or at least be actively working toward reaching it!!!

Identity crisis

Monday March 24th

I was just thinking, (about Bridget fitting in and making friends) and it got me to thinking about my own journey.

At what point do we, as parents, accept that our offspring are not going to fix the mistakes we made growing up? e.g. is Bridget allowed to make her own mistakes? even ones that I don't want her to make because they hurt too much? Is trying to help her avoid mistakes, stealing valuable learning opportunities for her?

I don't want my sweet little girl to ever feel hurt by her friends because she doesn't fit in, or they think she is weird. I think this was one of my big issues growing up, I could never accept myself as being myself. I always thought I was supposed to be someone different. Act a different way, act the way everyone else did (or how I perceived them to act). If I did act the way I thought others wanted me to act, would they like me better. I think growing up all over the place, and going to 4 different high schools really had an impact on me that I never before realized. I think that my "theatrical" streak was squashed when I started high school. Would I have turned out differently if I had nurtured that part of me? At Albert, I didn't try and hide that part of my personality, and it was the best out of all my high school years, is that significant? is my love of public speaking and being in front of an audience a product of this "theatrical" side?

Now that I accept me for who I am, faults and all :) (p.s. I love who I am, and all the fun things I do as hobbies and things I do with my family) the one downside is... I have no friends.

It's funny, now that I don't care what others think of me, that I have so many outside interests, I have no friends. "They" always say that your friends should and will love you just the way you are, if you let them see that person. I don't agree with this... since I am now who I really really want to be (I'm so happy with my life) but I have no friends... So why don't people like me just the way I am?

When I was young I always tried to be someone I thought others wanted to be friends with (e.g. the party girl, or the popular girl etc...) now that I live my life for me and I spend the majority of my time with my family and doing my hobbies (the gym, photography, scrapbooking, the cats etc...) I don't have any friends.
Does this mean if you follow your heart and do what feels best and right for you, that people wont be friends with you?
I know in my heart, the reason I don't have friends is that I don't have time for them, I don't have time to cultivate those relationships, because I am too busy pursuing what I love... the question is, can the 2 exist together? can you have friends and be who you are meant to be at the same time?

I hope for Bridget's sake the answer is Yes. I want her to have friends, and I want her to follow her own path and destiny. I just don't think I am a very good teacher or mentor for her in this respect.

I know... pretty deep for a Monday :)

so it has been a really loooong while...

Thursday Feb 27th 2014 (205.9)

I guess the month of February has blown by, and I have not written in my blog, nor have I paid any attention to my healthy eating, exercise, and weight loss efforts. (boooo)
Well, nothing like TODAY to get back on the band wagon :)

Tracey my personal trainer has a competition starting for the Month of March, I have to journal all my food intake, eat clean (she says paleo... but I dont think paleo is good for me) and exercise regularly to be entered into her contest... (I could win 3x personal training sessions donated by her!) pretty sweet deal considering she only has a few clients (perhaps 30-40?) so the odds are in anyone's favour to win! This is a contest that I like, where there are less than a million people entered :)

So I will begin today (Feb 27), but keep in mind I want to do this for the month of March!

What do I want to do:

1. track everything I eat
2. stay within my WW points
3. drink minimum 2L of water per day
4. sleep minimum 7 hours per day
5. get a minimum of 6000 steps per day
6. gym 3x per week or in basement gym
7. blog about it
8. oatmeal for breakfast 
9. eat 'out' only 2x per week (1x subway or pita pit & 1x at a restaurant)

#1 & #2 are my 2 biggest challenges. So if I do these 2 things and nothing else = ALL IS GOOD.
the other items on the list are the things I currently *mostly* do... I'd say about 80% of the time (e.g. I would say the sleeping thing is 98%! and the water thing is about 90%, so my overall healthy habits are where I want them to be)
Again, #1&2 are a challenge, so I really want to focus on these 2 things.

What do I need to do to prepare?
- plan some easy 'go to' dinners (e.g. 2x poached eggs + ww eng muffin + salsa and side salad or veggies or chicken breast + stirfry veggies etc...)
- plan around my schedule: gym, Bridget's activities, weekends etc...
- Plan activity on the weekends! enough of being a hermit!!!
- focus on my goals - i want to prove to myself that I can lose some weight, I have all the tools, i know what I need to do, i just need to DO IT.

One day at a time, or as Roni says "What you Can When You Can" #WYCWYC.
Just continuously make the effort to do the best that you can do!

Judgement

Wednesday Feb 5, 2014
(204.6)

Why do women judge each other so harshly?
Why do we care what others do or say?
Why is what others are doing more important than what we are doing ourselves?
I too am very guilty of this... but why?
I watch other women judge each other and catch myself thinking "why does she do it?" and then I think "why do I do it?" I need to be more concerned with changing my own judgmental behaviour than trying to change other's behaviour.
Who cares what others are doing... care what I am doing, and how I am trying not to judge.
"He who is without sin among you, let him be the first to throw a stone at her."
This is really hard to do.

example:
This lady at work said to me: (paraphrased)
"Oh, you're eating aspartame? I would never eat that stuff,  no wonder you don't care about eating from plastic containers..." referring to a conversation we had a few weeks back about how 'evil' using plastic glad ware containers were for re-heating food... (why does she even care)
I felt like screaming back at her... "I'm doing what I can, this is better than eating a chocolate bar!!!"
btw, I was eating an Fat Free Activia yogurt (it does have aspartame in it).

This is a far cry from the judgy "look at her hair, or look at what she is wearing etc..."  but this subtle "you don't do things my way" and "I'm so much better than you, cause I don't do THAT".
Why do women care so much about other people's choices?
I'm trying to teach Bridget that we all have our own rules, and we all have our own likes and dislikes.... and those differences are what make people interesting

Years ago, my sister in law said something to me that made me think "wouldn't the world be such a boring place if we all thought the same thing"... she was talking about her own creationist beliefs :) (??? of which I was judging her harshly asking why she believed in that crap:) ) and she called me on my judgments! and good for her. She said this and now I constantly think about this statement whenever I feel I am being judgmental.
I really dont want to be critical of others... I know I am with myself, and I am working on that too.

So I think I will embrace a new word and mantra:

Acceptance

of myself and others. I want to be the best me that I can possibly be. To do this, I have to accept that I am not perfect and that I try hard everyday. Somedays will be easier than others, but I will persevere and work toward being the best me possible. I need to accept that I can not change others, nor do I want to. We all have our own struggles in life and the day to day grind is not easy, so why worry about others, accept that they will do what they will do. I might struggle with eating less and consuming less packaged food. Others might struggle with not feeling loved, and still others might struggle with something far worse like addiction or self hatred. In the big grand scheme of life, I have it pretty easy... I just have to keep on moving forward and accepting myself for who and what I am capable of right now!