Resilience

This is a great discussion, thank you for the honesty and creative solutions. I might have to give some of them a try.
(@ Clare, I love Mariane Keys too!)

I had something happen to me about 8 years ago that I needed to 'bounce' back from, I am still working through it but find that I am less and less negatively affected by it.
background: When I returned to work after a long (1 year) maternity leave. In Canada we can take up to 12 months after the birth of a child, and can still expect our job to be waiting... or so I interpreted. Upon my return from Maternity leave, I found that the person I hired to temporarily replace me was now my boss. I was infuriated, I felt betrayed, I felt it was illegal (very grey area), I was so angry.
I spent years seeing a psychiatrist once per week, on a variety of antidepressants (celexa for 5+ years) and went through a variety of 'coaches' in various areas of my life. I seriously thought there was something wrong with me. I was struggling at being a new mom and feeling like a failure at my career.
I remember feeling 'stuck', I was terrified of moving, of change. Part of it was because I felt like a failure (if my company that I had given 12 years too didn't want me or need me, well then who else would), and the other part was I was severely depressed. I kept saying "I can't change or I won't change",  the best thing for me would have been to change jobs to get out of the toxic (for me) situation, but I was completely paralyzed by the idea of it. I don't know how I did it, but I was able to change companies and jobs. And this was the beginning of my resilience training. Action. If you don't like where you are, then move. I have been trying to practice this for the past 8 years, with some success.

Fast forward 8+ years, and thank goodness for time's ability to provide perspective. I can honestly say the anger that I held inside me for the perceived injustice that I felt was perpetrated against me, is *almost* gone. I wasted years of my life feeling like I was betrayed, and now I know that perhaps I was betrayed... but I was betrayed by a company, that was just doing what companies do... make money.
not a person, but a 'thing', a company.
it is hard to be angry at a thing, because in all reality the only person my anger was hurting was myself.
I like to think that my journey over the past 8+ years has not been wasted. I have learned a lot about myself and about how to adapt to change. Embrace it! change will happen even if you don't want it to.
Now I am trying to reverse some of the damage my anger and negative self image inflicted upon me. (weight gain and isolation)
Resilience is hard, but the good news is we get better at it each time we 'fall down', it is just practice.

It is so important that we each find the 'magic' potion that will get us moving again, moving past what ever it is that is bothering us. Unfortunately it is different for everyone, and may be different for you at different times along your journey. But I really think that what we are learning here at PN, by doing all these exercises is a massive database on ME... or as PN likes to call it "the Owners Manual".
I identified my Achilles heel way back on July 22 (day 2 of coaching) and I still struggle to overcome it every single day.
I have made my magic potion, my new 'mantra', my new focus for 2015
it is the word: ACT

short but powerful word

It also happens to be the very first lesson we learned about the power of the 5 minute action. I am building my resiliency and grit by learning to act even when I don't feel like it. To put my work out clothes on and my runners on, even when I don't feel like it. To commit to doing 5 minutes of exercise. To ignore the 'overwhelming' feeling that I have fallen off the wagon, and simply logon to PN coaching and just doing the habit and work out they tell me to do today. To ignore all the other habits and just ACT on the one thing I am supposed to do today. If I have fallen wayyy off course, just to pick one thing and ACT on it, like eat slowly or get out for a walk outside in the fresh air.
I am learning how to ACT, and how the idea of a 5 minute action can be my secret potion, my magnetic north, my recalculation... my resilience puzzle. It might not settle anything in my 'head' (e.g. anger or resentment) but it tends to push out negativity by replacing it with something that I am doing for myself, and by acting I find I can not 'think' too much because I am too busy doing or acting.

Here's to not being in the same place July 21, 2015!!!

Consistency is the key to progress

aka "Mowing the Lawn with your house on fire"

What to focus on

Let’s review where you should be putting your energy and attention:

Eat slowly, to 80% full, consistently.

Learn and follow your body cues, consistently.

Eat good quality food, consistently.

Be active regularly.

Do the right things, consistently.

In other words:

• Are you eating slowly and thoughtfully, making the best food choices possible, as often as possible?

• Are you eating to a true 80% full? Or just kinda sorta, sometimes?

• Are you eating real food instead of “diet foods” or other fake foods?

• Are you doing your workouts as scheduled? Are you putting in a good effort?

• Are you checking off your habits every day, and sticking to the previous habits?

• Are you sleeping and recovering enough? Do you have a good sleep routine (and are you using your relaxation techniques)?

• How consistent are you with your nutrition? (Check your food journals, or try another few days of food journaling, if you want to be sure. Don’t just rely on your memory.)

• Are little snacks and “extras” sneaking in? Are you “forgetting” about your daily Frappucino, muffin, or beers? Are you nibbling off others’ plates after dinner?

• Are your expectations appropriate? Are you trying to do too much too soon… or do you have a clear understanding of what realistic, long-term body transformation involves?

• Are you focused on taking ACTION, right now, today? Or are you “wondering and worrying”?

Assignment

What are the actions and behaviors that matter most for YOU?

• I really felt great when I was walking at lunch - I need to commit to doing this again. This got me consistently getting my 10,000+ steps in per day
• Regularly doing my PN scheduled work outs -
• Eating Slowly to 80% full

What can you do today to make sure you do those things?

• Tonight I will go to the gym,
• since i missed my walk at lunch today, I will do cardio tonight at the gym to get my 10,000+ steps in.
• I ate slow(er) at lunch today
• I will make an effort to eat slowly to 80% full for the rest of today
• I think this is what I need to focus on again.
• the first 3 habits and getting my workout in.
• I did it before and it wasnt hard. I need to do this again.
• I will start right now.
• eating slowly to only 80% full

Supplements Are Supplements

Supplements are supplemental

Supplements can't salvage a poor diet or inactivity. 
Work on improving your food choices, basic habits, and consistency before considering any additional supplements.
Again, supplements are supplements: an addition to a good foundation, not a substitute for good nutrition, nor a magic bullet.




For now, let’s keep a laser focus on what really matters:

• Do your workouts. Consistently.

• Read your lessons. Consistently.

• Do your habits. Consistently.

• Ask for help if needed. Immediately.

That’s how our PN Coaching finalists succeeded… and it’s how you’ll succeed too.

Good Stress & Bad Stress

Some stress is good stress. Good stress pushes you out of your comfort zone, but in a good way. Good stress helps you learn, grow, and get stronger.

Exercise can be another form of good stress. You feel a little uncomfortable but then you feel good, and after an hour or so, you’re done.


Each of us has a unique “recovery zone”. Our recovery zone depends on several factors such as:

• our age

• our natural personality type (i.e. are we adventure-seeking adrenaline junkies or homebodies who prefer calm and quiet?)

• our “stress resilience” — how well we cope with and rebound from stress overall

• our allostatic load — what else is going on in our lives

If your existing pile of straw is already heavy, then it’ll take only a few more straws to break you.

Assignment

What are 2 mentally stressful things that you experience regularly?

#1 Commuting to and from work

#2 Money worries

What are 2 emotionally stressful things that you experience regularly?

#1 when I am grumpy I 'lash out' at the ones I love most (my Mom and Dad, My husband, My daughter)

#2 trying to fit it all in - cooking, doing my workouts, taking care of daughter, taking care of cats, going to work, and making time for things i love to do.

What are 2 physically stressful things that you experience regularly

#1 commuting - this shows up again, since it is probably the #1 source of all my stress

#2 trying to fit it all in - cooking, doing my workouts, taking care of daughter, taking care of cats, going to work, and making time for things i love to do.

email to coach

This is the note I just sent to my coach:

Hi Coach ,

I guess my reset button got stuck :)

I may have taken this past weekend off from all thoughts of PN, even the exercise part (which I love).

Part of me was resenting the huge time and energy commitment I have made to this, and the fact that I am not seeing any results (on the scale). I was feeling “why bother” spending all this time working out and trying to juggle my schedule around to get the workouts in, and getting out at lunch and eating all this extra protein, and buying veggie supplements and protein powder, not eating treats, not going out for Friday lunches with my coworkers etc… I have been feeling like I have given up all my special indulgences like cuddling up on the couch with my daughter watching a movie and eating popcorn, or enjoying going out for lunch with my coworkers on a Friday etc… So I gave myself permission to take the weekend off from PN… although I am still suffering the guilt and after effects from eating a whole bag of popcorn… the salt (UGH!!!).

I shouldn’t say I haven’t seen any results, because I know my blood pressure has gone down, I am no longer dizzy and light headed all the time (even when sitting). My body feels stronger, my side plank ROCKS, squats are EASY!!! I can do burpees J etc… The changes to my physical abilities have seen enormous gains. Prior to PN I was working out 2x per week with a personal trainer, and 1x per week doing cardio. Now I have been going for a 2 – 3Km walk every weekday lunch hour, 3x weight trainings per week, 2x interval trainings and the 1x Active recovery and am always looking for new and fun ways to exercise and incorporate fun activity into my life and my family’s… and now even my coworkers (I have arranged a Thursday lunchtime skate at our indoor arena!!!)

The exercise component of PN has reenergized me to a point where I have not felt so HAPPY in over 8 years. (since before the birth of my child). I am completely addicted to how exercise makes me feel. I think no matter how this PN experiment goes, I will take away the need to exercise more than I was.

So I can say I have been seeing results on this PN journey.

The Habits…

These I am completely failing at. I think I was trying to deal with all the balls in the air at once and I felt overwhelmed and stopped doing any of them. (just after the protein habit) I know I should just do what the PN instructions say: Today’s lesson, Today’s Workout and Today’s Habit. But it is so hard not to get mired down in the other habits that I am not doing. I tend to have “all or nothing” thoughts. It comes from the same place as the perfectionist does.

I don’t really know how to fix it.

PN coaching is helping a bit, but I think I have been this way for so long it is a really really really hard habit to break, its almost part of my genetic code.

This carb habit is impossible. I know what I should be doing, and I even like Quinoa :) but actually doing it is proving to be way more difficult than I expected. I am so used to throwing some chicken in a wrap or having an English muffin with an egg and salsa etc… that breaking this is messing with my ‘go to’ recipes. It is now screaming of more hard work, since I have to research new recipes and find new carb sources that I like, and prepare them ahead of time

I keep wondering if this is worth it. Yes I would like to weigh less, but wowza it is ever difficult to shed even one pound.

This week, I am going to try and focus on the carb thing, and getting back into the exercise groove. (since I missed Friday and Saturday last week, and I haven’t gotten 10,000 steps in in 3 days) . I am going grocery shopping tonight, so I will have food in the house to get this thing done!!!

I really appreciate you checking in, I know I should be more self guiding and responsible, but man is it ever easy to fall of the wagon and stay off :)

NOTE: this coming weekend is Canadian thanksgiving … the good news is that it is pot luck. We are bringing a salad and doing grilled veggies on the BBQ. 

I have to stop looking so far into the future and getting overwhelmed. Planning and strategizing is good… but it can also freak me out and overwhelm me.

Id better stop obsessing over how things are going and just DO IT.

Thanks for checking in.

Fiona :)